Strange News by Elliote Wisanski Ever since Bobby Fischer defeated Borris Spassky to win the world chess title in 1972, some have alleged that a Yugoslavian chess player and inventor Nikola Telsa's idea of creating an energy beam weapon came to fruition. Even Spassky is rumored to have claimed he was being subjected to a Confusion Ray. Clearly since the FBI seized Tesla's papers after his death in 41 and has not released their content it raises suspicion. It sounds far fetched but respected scientists like Dr. Ross Adey, formerly of the Brain Research Center at University of Southern California has theorized one can induce behavioral changes if one imposes environmental fields that look like an electroencephalogram. A recent Study by the University of Zurich has shown Electro Magnetic Fields from cell phones can enhance the intensity of the brain's electrical signals. One more thing; rumors about a school of chess devoted to the use of astrology and dating back to the time of Alexander the great, in what was Yugoslavia, have abounded, since the 1952 discovery of the mysterious Sarajevo Manuscript in a Moslem household in that city. The manuscript is believed to be a copy of a document dating to 897. With this background, let Ismael Musemic of Bosnia tell his story. "First let me thank you for hearing my story. No other Chess News Letter would. What most people don't realize is the Sarajevo Manuscript is one of many holy epistles to our group. We call ourselves Saher Al Shatrang (We could not find a translation). I know you Americans laugh when I suggest the light of a full moon affects the way you think but many here do believe it. Why can't you accept that Electromagnetic field coming from the planets and stars can affect different portions of the brain? When Mercury starts its retrograde linear thinking weapons like piling pin after pin in a chess game are best. We can use the pin motif during a game at that time as our most thematic weapon and win more often. On a winter Balsamic moon's night (No moon) a chess technique called Domination is best. It perhaps requiring the most ubiquitous brain activity. You may laugh but studies show Grand Master use different parts of their brains then other players. Members of our group have included Nikola Tesla as well as many inventors. There was a small cadre within the Saher Al Shatrang called the Tesla Council . As leader of the Al-Biruni Council a majority school of thought within Saher Al Shatrang I decreed, "But I say to you, the Tesla Council is wrong." That same year 1994 I began my campaign against the users of the Confusion Ray device. I said to use astronomy is one thing but to secretly expose your opponent to artificially produced electromagnetic rays to keep certain parts of his brain from figuring out positions. That's almost cheating. You know what they did? They threw me out of the group. I am now excommunicated. I still play chess here but for some reason I seem to lose all of my games. I cannot prove and teach the truths of our philosophies to people because I always lose. One day last month during a game I had to run to the bathroom. In the bathroom was one of the members of my old group dressed in black. He had what looked like a miniature of a radar device that they use at the airport. I asked him what it was. He said he was taking it home to use as an antenna for his T.V. I then remembered where I saw him last. It was at a Category 19 tournament in Sarajevo in May of 1999. Apparently he was taking home a new antenna back then too and just happened take it out of its packaging in the bathroom. I realized at that moment the Tesla Council had a vendetta against me and were trying to get me to give up my first love chess. Then when I heard, Vladimir Kramnik was able to draw Deep Fritz in a tournament. I realized how powerful the Tesla heretics had become. They must have used the device on Garry Kasparov five years ago when he lost his a match to IBM's Deep Blue computer. No wonder he looked at his game afterward and said he was "ashamed" of the way he played, having made obvious blunders. He claimed he could easily beat the computer. I think there were many technicians wandering around at the time of his game. Supposedly tinkering with the program? They weren't all tinkering with the program. Some were tinkering with Kasporovs mind. Probably from the bath room like they have been doing with me all these years. Think of how much the CPU has improved after all these years. I feel the reason Kramnik drew against Deep Fritz was they didn't let the tinkerers in this time. Please investigate." Our Editor Brad Zang refused to form the investigation committee. He said, "I don't want to sound condescending but Deep Blue analyzed, 40 times the number of positions a second, that Deep Fritz did. I would also like to remind you all, while we welcome your contributions, it is our policy not to investigate Men in Black, because, it is ridiculous idea based on a movie."