The League Of Extraordinary Chess Players
October 25 2003 Morrigan Queens Gambit
Strange News from the Jax Chess News
The Queens Gambit Declined Slav Defense 1.d4 d5 2.c4 c6
End Game Lesson
Opening Lesson 1
Opening Lesson 2
Opening Lesson 3
Opening Lesson 4
Opening Lesson 5
Opening Lesson 6
Opening Lesson 7
Jacques Meises Dutch defence 1. d4 f5 2. g3 b6
The Staunton Gambit 1.d4 f5 2.e4
Scholastic pictures and crosstables

Morrigan Queens Gambit

Jonathan Swift

Morrigan Queens Gambit Reported by Bradley Zang

 The Druids say great heros are only conceived by a darkness that hovers like a plague over the land.

Some suggest a writer and chess player Jonathan Swifts, conceived during the worst black plague episode in Europe's history ( born 1667 - died 1745) was a true druid hero.

It is recorded the two chess opponents Johnathan Swift and Lord Mountjoy ( The Mountjoys were a family of alchemists, their real name was Blount.) in the winter of 1712 spent an evening at Montjoy's home.

Lord Mountjoy as a lark decided to try an opening recommended by a whisperous Gaelic speaking house guest, ( the Morrigan Opening.) Morrigan {Queen of Sorcerers}

 It is said Swift won, and that night the allegorical opus Gullivers Travels ( published 1726) came to Swift in a dream.

Others claim Morrigan was more likely to have inspired Swift as an Irish champion to criticize, British rule with the macabre classic, A Modest Proposal. ( published 1729. In it he suggests the Irish should eat their children)

Most prefer to believe the former. Gullivers Travels foretold the discovery of two satellites of Mars, Deimos and Phobos, 150 years before the equipment was invented to see them.

Here is the prophetic quote about Lilliputian scientists in Gullivers Travels " have likewise discovered two lesser stars, or satellites, which revolve around Mars, whereof the innermost is distant from the center of the primary planet exactly three of its diameters, and the outermost five; the former revolves in the space of ten hours, and the latter in twenty one and a half..."

Gullivers Travels also foretold of the stock rocketing of Yahoo whose leadership may be worse then the four horsemen of the apocalypse, an of cities that move like ships across the sky.

 If information mining is what Yahoo is all about because knowledge is power then Gullivers Travels to some is the mother load.

 With this back ground let Ryan Noonan tell his story.

 I was born and raised in Limerick. I'm a modern man. I play internet chess. One day three months ago while playing on Yahoo Games, I set up a table for a one hour game. I expected to wait a long time, when some one with the screen name Orthostat asked to play. I was going to boot him from the table because he was unrated, and I didn't want to lose many points on my rating. But since I didn't expect many long time control players I gave him a shot.

 I played black. I like to play reciprocal pawn opening; so, when my opponent played the Queens gambit against me I had no problem. I thought it was an obscure form of the Kraus attack, so I decided to vary from the book.

 I had a very hard time of it, but just managed to get a draw after 90 moves. Othostat asked to play again but I declined not wanting to lose anymore points. It didn't matter anyway I was soon disconnected from the net by one of our frequent Brown outs.

That night I had a dream that a beautiful woman visited me. She said, "it was time to choose another champion." The next day I went to the same yahoo game site and set up a table. Orthostat asked to play but I booted him. We then had another brown out.

 When I finally got my machine up a message written on the screen saver as a background picture said August 26 we must meet.

That night the beautiful blond woman visited me in my dream and told me her name was Morrigan, That I had played her queens gambit so well I could become her apprentice. That we had to meet and play a game at midnight on August 26 at nearby Lough Gur.

 I asked," Where in Lough Gur? I played there as a child. It is a big place". She said "let stone Orthostat 47 be where we play our game." Most locals know about the nearby ruins of Lough Gur but practically nothing about the ancients that lived there, except that some of their descendants are supposed to have founded Limerick.

 I checked with the local tourist guides about Orthostat 47. One told me what it was, and of its fame. It was a stone that seemed to have a picture of the moon on it made, thousands of year ago. Many of its features were correct and not visible to the naked eye. I thought cute, but not scary, but, that morning I read in the paper that mars was going to be at its closest with earth in 60000 years.

When I arrived Midnight on August 26 the woman in my dream appeared with eleven other cloaked dark figures. My dream girl had the bluest eyes I ever saw they were kind of transparent like my puppies eyes.

She then set up the board and started playing me a game of chess. Morrigan claimed to be an elder of the astrological sect of druids called the dribians.

The queens gambit she played was a test. A test of inspiration to become her knight. For her knight would be victorious in their fight against the yahoos. I told her I though she was hot.

One of the cloaked figures then placed a crystal on a stone which he claimed would use the light from mars shining between two stones to guide me.

 I was surprised when the whole area lit up with holograms of our solar system. I started to have visions or maybe I was daydreaming. Visions about a battle between humans with metal heads and real people, about an EM pulse weapon developed to kill the metal head and about a Google Stock offering to help defeat the Yahoos.

 Morrigan then said " I will give you the knowledge of the ancients, and you shall be our champion if you win." I asked her, " if we could go skinny dipping later after some drinks."

 She said, " you shall have the power of prophecy through astronomy even greater that of Swift's."

 I said, " OK but You don't need to wear the robe." Anyway I got no response from her and lost interest in the game. Finally I blundered and lost that same strange Queens Gambit Kraus attack.

 I soon fell asleep. When I woke up in the morning everyone was gone. Has anyone else had this problem. Also since then I haven't been able to get a date